Learning that it wasn’t my fault, which seems so obvious now, but it's not obvious when your spiralling in grief and anger. Also knowing that it wasn’t their choice to develop an addiction, as much as I hated it.
Peer, Vancouver, Canada
Why an addiction?
An addiction is complicated and isn’t caused by just one thing. Sometimes, the way people talk about it, the news, and even our own experiences might make us believe that it's our parents' fault, our fault, or "in our genes", but that’s not true. Read below to learn more
Common questions
An addiction (often called a substance use disorder) is a health condition, even though lots of people think it is a choice. It is diagnosed when substance use leads to health issues or challenges at home, school, or work. However, many people
do not get "diagnosed".
people in Canada have an addiction (sometimes called a substance use disorder), which means it is really common.
People can have an addiction to many different things, not just drugs like alcohol. Many people are addicted to electronics, food, and shopping for example.
Stress and childhood trauma often plays a role in addictions, AND, stress or trauma is never an excuse for harmful behaviours towards people. However, learning about them can help you understand why a parent might keep using even when it causes harm in the home.
Why do people use drugs?
Some of us might have had a tough time because of a parent's drug use, leaving us to wonder, "why do people use drugs anyway?"
People use drugs for many reasons, like coping with pain, ceremonies, or celebrating.
​
Double click the shapes to learn about the different ways people use substances.
Regular use
What can help my parent (or me if I am having challenges with my substance use)?
Many of us have just wished that our parent can just stop using drugs like alcohol, but every parent has different needs. Even though the tv shows, doctors, and even people who have had addictions before can make it seem like it is easy for everyone to just stop using, it is actually really hard. But there are things that can help your parent use in safer ways, use less, or stop use (if they are able and want to). Click the rectangles to learn more:
When a parent has used a drug for a long time, stopping or reducing usage can be extremely difficult due to withdrawal symptoms such as vomiting, shaking, and intense cravings. Detox centers, available in most cities, offer professional support and medication to help manage these symptoms and assist parents in their health journey.
Harm reduction is a public health approach meant to minimize the negative effects of drug use. It uses practical, non-judgmental methods to reduce risks and improve the well-being of people who use drugs. This can include providing safe supplies, offering safer drug alternatives, and giving people the resources and education they need to reduce harm. The goal is to make drug use safer and improve health outcomes without necessarily requiring people to stop using drugs, respecting their choice
Treatment is a really general word used for describing services that want to help people stop using drugs. Different centres offer different support, but most "treatment" centres today do not allow any drug use, which can make it difficult for many people who are not in a place in their lives to stop using completely, maybe because of pain, or trauma, or lack of additional supports.
Mental health supports can vary, and can include access to counsellors, peer support, and medications and also help with paying bills, finding jobs, and heal past harm, all of which can help a parent get to the root of their substance use challenges, such as childhood trauma.
There are medications parents can get from their doctor to help them withdrawl from drugs, to help with their pain and or mental health challenges, or that help parents use drugs in safer ways
Substance use challenges are often because of other reasons such as mental health issues, stress (from finances or relationships), childhood trauma, and the way using substances for a long time can affect the brain. Supports that get to the root can help parent's use substances in healthier ways and might include help with paying bills, finding a job, seeing a counsellor, feeling connected to a community and healing trauma.
Some things that have helped us
Realizing that how she treats me and talks to me is a projection of her own trauma, not a reflection of my worth as a person.
Peer, Canada